regression

"infants and toddlers throw a tantrum when things don't go their way.  this frustration and anger and helplessness that lead to violence - let's call it ogre energy - this ogre energy is an early attempt at getting your needs met.  it worked ok then.  it doesn't work too well now.


sometimes you regress when you experience a feeling that reminds you of ogre energy, particularly frustration.  when you feel frustrated, especially when there is some self-blame going on, it is easy to slide into ogre energy.  only now, when you feel ogre energy, you generally don't direct it outward, you direct it inward.  you yell and scream at yourself, you are impatient and intolerant and not nice.  you hit and kick and behave badly.  you beat yourself up. and then you beat yourself up even more for allowing the internal tantrum, for being an ogre to yourself.  it's a no-win.


it is not easy being human.  you have so many habits - personal, social, as a species - that lead you to self-violence.  I invite you to practice love, practice understanding, practice forgiveness.  practice on *you.*


give yourself permission to learn and grow and make mistakes.  permission to be human.  permission to *be.*


when you feel frustrated, allow it.  when you are angry, allow it.  feel your feelings and then move on, don't punish yourself for them.  be an ogre if you need to be.  and then lighten up!"