unfold your fan

millie shows me a delicate japanese fan with beautiful artwork.  then she closes it.


"you all walk around with your fans folded, hiding your true selves, so that you look as much as possible like everyone else."

the fan opens part way, then snaps shut.  there is a feeling of fear.


"fans are not as pretty when they are closed.  they aren't functional when they are closed.  humans are the same way.  open your fan.  you function better when you are open.  it takes a lot of energy to close yourself off, let go of the fear and use that energy for a positive purpose."

I associate total openness with lack of boundaries, over-sharing, lots of negative things.


"everyone has boundaries.  physical, energetic, emotional boundaries.  the problem isn't that boundaries are lacking, but that people fail to observe them.  do what you need to do to keep yourself comfortable, but know that you can occupy your own physical and energetic space in such a way that others do not intrude.  


this is a separate issue from your openness.  you can be open and also fully occupy your space, with no reactivity or defensiveness, you simply own your space and others cannot affect that."

it seems that we look outside of ourselves when we should be looking in, and vice-versa.


"that is a side effect of living so many lifetimes in a purely physical, body-based world.  you forget what is possible.  you lose touch with some of your tools.  as you re-integrate as a spirit in body, these tools will become more available to you."

so I'm guessing my use of these tools will not prevent others from over-sharing.


"no.  but it will help you not to be bothered by that.  and it will help you to maintain your own space, with your own energy, which always feels right and good.  the energy of others, whatever that may be, will not enter your space."

that does sound good.


"as you move through the world, sure of your space, comfortable in your space, you can let go of fear.  scary things may come, but they cannot enter your space."

that sounds great!


"you can do this.  you already do it.  when the fear gets into your space, it is because you agree with it.  when you agree with it, you accept it, you allow it, and it comes in.  try just looking at the fear from a neutral place.  don't agree.  don't resist.  just look.  see what happens.


let go of fear and it will let go of you.


open yourself to life, to each other, to the real, full you.  unfold your fan."

thank you, millie.